The fact that you're struggling doesn't make you a burden. It doesn't make you unloveable or undesirable or undeserving of care. It doesn't make you too much or too sensitive or too needy.
It makes you human. Everyone struggles. Everyone has a difficult time coping, and at times, we all fall apart.
During these times, we aren't always easy to be around — and that's okay. No one is easy to be around one hundred percent of the time. Yes, you may sometimes be unpleasant or difficult. And yes, you may sometimes do or say things that make the people around you feel helpless or sad. But those things aren't all of who you are and they certainly don't discount your worth as a human being.
The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved. You can be difficult and still be cared for. You can be less than perfect, and still be deserving of compassion and kindness.
—Daniell Koepke
What are good ways to handle rejection in life? →
Separate the decision from the outcome.
Some choices are inherently risky. For example, let's say I propose the following game: you pay me a dollar, I flip a coin, if it's heads I give you $10 and if it's tails you get nothing. This is a great bet for you to take, but of course you will walk away with nothing half of the time. The key is to remember is that you made the right decision, even though it did not lead to the ideal outcome.
Making good choices is all you can ask of yourself. For example, let's say that if you ask for a raise, perhaps nothing happens 2/3 of the time and you get a 10% salary bump 1/3 of the time. So you ask your boss, and he says no. That sucks. But did you make the right decision? Sure! You had nothing to lose, and you knew that asking was not a sure bet. Your correct decision didn't pay off this time, but it might pay off the next time or the time after that.
Why would you be unhappy about making the right choice?
Focus on the process, not on the goal.
If your goal is to get a job, then you'll be anxious during the interview and disappointed if you don't get the job. If your goal is to do your best at an interview or to apply the lessons you learned at the last interview, then success is entirely in your control. This is a refinement of the last point: if the process is in your control but the outcome is not, then focus only on the process.
We all die. The goal isn't to live forever — the goal is to create something that will.
—Chuck Palahniuk
Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around.
You tell them things that you've never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can't wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement.
They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.
The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it's like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn't exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day's work and always brings a smile to your face.
In their presence, there's no need for continuous conversation, but you find you're quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there's a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.
You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that's so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.
—Bob Marley
Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.
—Alan Cohen
When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed.
—Lyanla Vanzant
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.
—Lao Tzu
Wherever you go, go with all your heart.
—Confucious
It's okay. It's okay to want someone you can't have. It's okay to keep friendships when you don't want them, or want something more. It's okay to cry when you're hurt and it's okay to stay mad at someone who hurt you.
Believe it or not, it's always going to be okay. That's just how it works.
Sometimes, things don't always work out the way you want them to, and a lot of times, it seems like they never will, but it's okay. That's how life's supposed to go.
It's all about learning how to deal with the bumpy parts in the road and waiting till they're smooth again. It's all about forgiving and forgetting. It's all about waiting and wishing.
That's just how life is.
Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.
—Unknown